Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Effective immediately

Two apparently normal and harmless words, 'effective' and 'immediately', when used in conjunction with each other, have disproportional power compared to most other combinations of words that I've come across in my professional life.

I've unfortunately seen it's power so much and so often that it shakes me up and keeps me in that state for a good 8 hours. I'd rather be in 20 feet radius of a wild tiger in a remote jungle. Ok maybe 500 feet radius in a bullet-proof van with an armed forest officer and his backup but whatever.

Effective immediately there are no more ladies restrooms.
Effective immediately there are no more weekends off.
Effective immediately you cease to exist.

Dramatic? Perhaps a tad but the effect is the same no matter what follows those two words because it's far from pleasant. If it ain't pleasant, it'll be ridiculous which means there's only one right way of using these two words - the unpleasant way. Try it out. It might be a fun little exercise.

Effective immediately I like you. (so lame)
Effective immediately I will buy you lunch every day. (beyond nerdy)
Effective immediately you are promoted with a 15% raise. (oooh this one isn't too bad but far from ideal)

For the most part, it's unsettling to say the least even when it doesn't involve you. Who knew words could be so creepy?

If you found this blog vague, it was deliberate. At least for my sake, I hope it was vague.

3 comments:

Kusha said...

Haha..funny how i have never bothered about these two but just what follows them! :)

Pari said...

:) You prolly have an acute case of the 'glass half full' syndrome, which would be awesome.

Kusha said...

haha No!I could be called a delusional too :)